Fuel Economy for Dummies

Checking your oil, Izzy?

The research team at the Antisocial Network absolutely loves to catch people repurposing the rubbish they published at long-dead content farms for their current freelancing gigs. The team's learned how to recognize the half-assed updating job that so often marks old content from places like Helium.com and AssociatedContent, both of which have gone to the web graveyard in the sky. Take, for instance, the scribblings of one Isabelle Esteves at WritEdge.com; most of which were originally published at the website Helium.com, where she was a "travel manager" or something like that. Izzy republished an article she called "How To Save Money At The Gas Pump"¹ not long ago, changing the first line to update something she'd originally published in a significantly different economic environment. 

Here's what she said in that first line...

"Even with recent decreases at the gas pump, people are looking for ways to lower their gas consumption and the price."

We assume that it originally said, "With the recent increases..."; though the sentence doesn't make any sense either way. "People are looking for ways to lower... the price"? Do you really think so, Isabelle? If you do believe that statement, you obviously don't understand the economy of the oil business...

Whatever. Esteves then goes on to "inform" us that 

"The FTC offers a few strategies that can help you to save on fuel every day all year long."

While linking to a website run by -- and it says this clearly at the top of the page -- the Department of Energy. That's the DoE, Isabelle -- not the FTC! But to the meat of the matter... Isabelle starts by telling us that

"Some grocery stores are offering 10 cents off a gallon... for every $50 or $100 dollars that you purchase from their store. Other are offering a lot more for buying certain combinations of products. This can add up to a free tank of gas for just doing your regular grocery shopping."

Sentence fragments and other grammatical mistakes notwithstanding, Izzy's clearly full of shit: A free tank of gas? If you have to spend $2,000 at a grocery store to "earn" two bucks a gallon off of a maximum of 25 gallons (the "Fuel Rewards" deal as offered by Kroger), you had better make certain that you didn't spend an extra fifty dollars on groceries by being "loyal" to the store! Get smart, people! 

More Izzyisms: "Maintain your vehicle: This involves everything from using the correct octane recommend by the manufacturer to choosing to use motor oil that has the words energy conserving on the label... Change your air filter often..." Errrm, how about, oh, we dunno, tuneups? Regular maintenance of the emissions system? All the other periodic maintenance your owner's manual specifies? That's not to mention that changing your air filter before you need to -- "often" -- is a waste of money you could, gasp, spend on gasoline! Oh, yeah - and maybe she should have said something about that "Check Engine" light that's been on for eighteen months?

Izzy's been here before in several categories (usually travel and automotive), and every time it's obvious that she doesn't have the slightest idea what she'd talking about. That's the very definition of a Dumbass of the Day, right? Right...

¹  This website is now defunct, but you can see the post using the Wayback machine at archive.org. Its URL was   writedge.com/how-to-save-money-at-the-gas-pump/

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