The Geology of Floor Tile for Dummies

Travertine floor tiles

Occasionally our research staffers run across otherwise perfectly good. information... well, sometimes it's just acceptable information – that's marred by a glaring factual error. There's not enough there to build a complete DotD article, but the bogus factoids start to stick in one's metaphorical craw. Today, we thought maybe we'd flush out some of the dross that's built up, starting with a couple of utterly stupid statements about rocks made by people trying to look knowledgeable about their fields. Both are from TheSpruce.com, a niche website for home improvements that was formerly part of About.com.

First up is "flooring insider and freelancer writer" Joseph Lewitin, who says he has a Bachelor's Degree from Binghamton University (LinkedIn says it's in philosophy). Joe's topic is "Natural Slate Floor Tile." That post is where Lewitin attempted to pass off this claim about slate:

"Slate flooring tile is a type of natural stone which is quarried from the side of mountains or taken from the earth. A finely grained, homogeneous, metamorphic rock, it is named for the way the material forms in plains [sic], like sheets resting one atop the other, compressed under great pressure to create a powerful bond."

We take issue with that: first, WTF is the difference between "quarried from the side of mountains" and "taken from the earth"? and second, slate doesn't "[form] in plains"; the name comes from its tendency to break into plates. Lewitin's hangup with mountains as the only site for quarrying appears again... he also blathers a bit about the environmental impact of transporting "very heavy" slate after quarrying... what a yutz.

The second candidate today is home-remodeling specialist Lee Wallender (what else do you do with two English degrees?). Wallender's scientific illiteracy shows up in his About.com post, "3 Travertine Tile Ideas."¹ That's where Lee tries to tell his readers that,

"Granite and marble are metamorphic rocks, formed within the Earth under extreme heat and pressure. If you remember anything from high school geology, you'll know that travertine is totally different--a young, porous form of limestone."

Wait, what? Granite is a metamorphic rock? We call bullshit! And while we're at it, 1) does anyone take geology in high school? and 2) WTF does "young" have to do with travertine? Travertine is a rock type, not an age designation! Wallender is apparently impressed by the fact that people can see travertine being deposited in places like Yellowstone National Park. That doesn't mean all travertine is young... So there you have it: twin Dumbass of the Day winners, both of whom completely botched simple descriptions of rock types, probably because they got their "information" from industry types instead of... well, from something as mundane as wikipedia: at least there you can learn that granite is an igneous rock and slate tends to split along planes. Idiots.

¹ The original has been deleted by the website, but can still be accessed using the Wayback machine at archive.org. Its URL was   www.thespruce.com/travertine-flooring-tile-1822632

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