Splash Blocks for the Dummy Homeowner

The wrong way to use splash blocks

A couple of years ago, one of our staffers was walking his dog in a nearby apartment complex and snapped the photo shown at left. Little did we know when we named some faceless maintenance worker the Dumbass of the Day way back in February, 2017, that we would some day come across a HomeSteady.com post that might as well have been written by the same person. It's "How to Use a Splash Block"¹... but LinkedIn says that Brenda Priddy lives a thousand miles away from that apartment. My goodness, how dumbassery can spread...

Priddy, for what (little) it's worth, insists on calling the device mentioned in the title a "splash box." Hmmm... must be local to the DFW area... anyway, here's some of what Ms. Brenda has to say, with our drainage expert's commentary following:

1. "A splash box is a plastic or cement angled block designed to go under a gutter downspout to catch rainwater as it falls."
2. "A splash box is especially important in homes with basements or subfloors under the ground."
3. "Place the splash box directly below the gutter downspout. Position the widest end under the spout, with the narrow end facing away from the side of the house."
4. "Dig the area in a slightly angled shape, with the highest point directly under the downspout and the lowest point near the other side of the splash box. Make the angle between the two sides no greater than 2 inches."

Ummmm, no, Brenda:

1. A splash block (or "box," if you prefer) does not "catch rainwater as it falls"; it diverts water coming from a downspout.
2. That's not what a subfloor is, Brenda.
3. Wrong: place the narrow end under the downspout.
4. WTF does that even mean? You don't measure angles in inches!

Yeah, it sure looks like that anonymous apartment maintenance drone followed the instructions our Dumbass of the Day published. More's the pity!

¹ The original has been deleted by Leaf Group, but can still be accessed using the Wayback machine at archive.org. Its URL was   ehow.com/how_12003532_use-splash-block.html

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