"Demystifying" Drilling for Oil, the Dummy Approach

Pangea

Our staff geologist started in the oil industry in 1980: meaning more than thirty-five years’ experience in a field that pretty much mystifies a lot of people. Thankfully, there are citizen journalists out there to “demystify” the oil and gas industry, learned folk like Melvin Porter, who hung his hat over at HubPages.com – or maybe it’s Squidoo; we always get the two confused. 

Anyway, Mel took it upon himself once upon a time to educate the public on an industry where our guy's spent more than half his life, posting something he called “Oil Well Drilling: Explained.” Thanks ever so much, Mel, for all the laughs, that is. Why don't we start with your concluding paragraph, in which you explain the process known as completion (follow the link to the Schlumberger Oilfield glossary entry on the topic)? Mel said, 

“Then the rig crew pumps concrete into the hole to form a casing and let it hardened. Finally when the casing hardened an explosion is set off at the pre-set depth to break the casing to allow oil to flow up the pipe. Finally, the crew connects a device called a 'Christmas tree' to the top of tubing and cement to the top of the casing. The Christmas tree thems to control the flow of oil [sic].”

OK, we're really not sure what the last sentence was supposed to mean… but, wretched grammar notwithstanding, the rest of it is pure rubbish filtered through a complete lack of knowledge. First, casing is steel pipe cemented in place – not "concrete" all by itself. Second, what’s this “explosion is set off... to break the casing” bull, besides passive voice? Cased-hole completions involve lowering a perforating gun, which essentially shoots a hole through the casing (and the cement behind it) to expose the rocks to the wellbore.

Just so you know there's more, friend Mel started out wrong to begin with: He repeated a third-grader’s version of "How did the Oil Get There?” “It started 50 million years ago when dinosaurs roamed the Earth and all the continents were together as one large landmass called ‘Pangea’. [sic]” Nope, Mel, that's utter bull: dinosaurs went extinct about 65 million years ago; and the breakup of Pangea began around 200 million years ago. For your inability to do even the most basic research, Melvin Porter, you’re our Dumbass of the Day. Wear that badge with pride, you blithering idiot.

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