Antique Guitar Identification for Dummies

Custom-made guitar

The hallmark of good old eHow.com has always been freelancers holding forth on topics about which they know nothing. Even a rudimentary knowledge of a topic is often sufficient to realize that the content isn't original, but simply parroted from another website. We don't have an expert on guitars at the Antisocial Network, but even our wannabe Eric Clapton knows hella more than eHow.com's Meredith Jameson, who tried to explain "How to Identify Antique Guitars" (moved by Leaf Group to their niche site Our Pastimes [and then deleted¹]). She failed miserably...

Meredith's "process," such as it is, breaks down into 5 steps.

"1. Evaluate the guitar closely. Is the material difficult to find or commonly used? "

after which she explains that Brazilian rosewood is a protected species. No other "material" is mentioned, including... we dunno, ivory in the nut, maybe? And the use of "material" makes it pretty clear she used a thesaurus avoid to getting caught plagiarizing...

"2. Examine the details of the guitar. Do they seem to be done by hand or by machine? After 1970, guitars started being manufactured by machine and lost many of the individual detailing that made them unique. "

Besides the use of passive voice, now anathema to DMS content editors, Meredith doesn't explain how one might choose which details to "examine." And then there's the simple fact that plenty of guitars are still made by hand (see the image at right, for example) - has she never heard of a luthier? We're going to assume not...

"3. Feel the wood on the guitar. If it is thin or slick, the guitar is probably modern."

We wonder, how is this different from step 2? Ok, got it: it's not - it's just that eHow required five steps... "4. Look at the wood around the hardware. If it is darker around the hardware, the hardware is original to the piece and is probably an antique." Huh? Having original hardware makes the guitar an antique? Then all the guitars at our office (like those at left) must therefore be antiques. Well, except perhaps our Sigma acoustic guitar, because we had to have its nut replaced a few years ago. Say, Meredith, just out of curiosity since you're such an expert: what's the "nut"?

"5. Learn about your individual guitar. There are indications that differ for each guitar type and manufacturer regarding antiques. " Ah, yes, the required "action verb."  Five steps, none of which has any useful explanation. For instance, how does one identify Brazilian rosewood or distinguish hand work from machine work? Nope, the usual eHow bullshit, cranked out by a freelancer with no knowledge of the topic. Here at the Antisocial Network, that's why we call someone like Meredith the Dumbass of the Day..

¹ If you're curious, the original eHow version, URL ehow.com/how_6588979_identify-antique-guitars.html , can be seen using the Wayback Machine at archive.org.
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