Installing Bullnose Trim for Dummies

bullnose trim shape

Sometimes it only takes is a single sentence, even a single phrase, to realize that the online advice you're getting isn't coming from a professional. In more than a few cases, this so-called "advice" was written by someone who knows even less about the topic than whoever asked the question in the first place! That has long been the general complaint concerning How-To advice written by the many journalism and "communications" majors at eHow.com – like the time Shala Munroe, with her shiny communications degree from Jacksonville University, tried to tell us "How to Install Wood Bullnose Trim."¹

Shala almost immediately put the bull in bullnose with her introduction:

"When installing your hardwood floor, use wood bullnose trim to bridge the height distance between your floating hardwood floor and your carpet, or to finish stair edges."

Excuse us? "between your floating hardwood floor and your carpet"? We suspect Shala was confused about the definition of "floating floor": apparently she thinks it means a floor that is raised, as opposed to the real meaning, a floor that isn't attached to the substrate (e.g., Pergo®). You also don't float hardwood, but that's a topic for another day. Either way, you don't use bullnose for the transition strip between wood and carpet. Shala, you fool!

Shala continues to give instructions for installing bullnose; instructions any dumbass could figure out: measure, cut, glue, nail. But Shala's lack of knowledge shines brightly in such instructions as "If you're not using tongue-and-groove wood, nail the trim along the edge opposite the curved side." We still don't know what that rubbish means... and then there's "Apply wood putty to the dents left by the nails." If we're following Shala's instructions at this point, we're using 18-ga brads and a hammer. Just a hammer – no nail set – so this dumbass is telling us to fill in the hammer dents with wood filler. Boy: that's gonna look nice after we finish it!

For her contributions to the stupidification of the internet and for the chutzpah it takes to pass off owning a flower shop as construction expertise, Shala Munroe is the Antisocial Network's Dumbass of the Day (with an assist going to Demand Media).

¹ The original has been deleted by Leaf Group, but can still be accessed using the Wayback machine at archive.org. Its URL was   ehow.com/how_7810941_install-wood-bullnose-trim.html

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