Laundry Hookups for Dummies

Apartment-sized laundry

Among stock characters on television sitcoms, especially the second- and third-rate varieties, is the idiot character. This is the guy (Cliff on "Cheers") or girl (Mandy on "Last Man Standing") who's just plain out of it. We figure that there are people like that in real life, and not a few of them have tried to cash in on the reams of money you earn freelancing at content farms. Here at the Antisocial Network we run across such people every day. Trust us, there are a lot of them out there... take, for instance, Khalidah Tunkara, who laid it all out there trying to tell readers at eHow.com "How to Hook Up a Washer and Dryer in an Apartment"¹ for Hunker.com.

Khalidah starts out with a bit of a problem when she tells her readers that...

"Adding a washer and dryer to an apartment can bring an immense amount of relief for the apartment-dweller."

We're not quite certain how one might "[add] a washer and dryer to an apartment": does Khalidah think people can just re-plumb the walls in an apartment building? We have to admit we aren't sure, but don't most apartments that already have hookups also have the appliances? That's straight out of duh-ville, we suspect. Anyway, we'll let Ms Tunkara explain the rest:

"Maneuver the washer and dryer into positions that will allow both to connect to the outlets at the same time." That's rather a long way to say "put them in the laundry area," doncha think? and then there's "Connect the dryer to the three-pronged electrical outlet located on the wall. The prong is larger than a regular wall socket and very distinct. " Huh? the prong is "very distinct"? Do you maybe mean the plug is distinct? And that's only if it's a 220-volt plug, which is unusual for the small, apartment-sized dryers. Khalidah also thinks some of them are gas-powered dryers, which is very unlikely: "Turn off the gas before attaching the dryer to the gas line if the dryer is gas powered instead of electric. It is best to consult with a technician from your gas company for the hookup."

Or maybe you should, we dunno, have some idea of what you're doing? But, of course, Khalidah saves the best for last:

"Position the washer facing toward you and connect the rubber lines to the corresponding hot- and cold-water spouts. If the spouts do not say which is which, hold an empty water jug under one spout and turn it on. If the water eventually runs hot or warm, connect the hot-water line to this spout.

Plug the washer into the wall outlet. Make sure that the water connections are tight and have a seal around them to avoid water leakage traveling into the electrical outlets.

Turn on the water spouts after the washer is connected properly. The washer should have a sensor that knows when water is flowing. This will allow the water to stop flowing from the water spouts into the washer when not in use."

Did Khalidah miss something? Oh, yes, Khalidah missed something! Besides calling faucets "spouts," she didn't mention the water discharge from the washing machine; so anyone who depends on her "instructions" is going to be left with water running all over the floor after their first load of wash. Talk about losing your damage deposit! all thanks to yet another Dumbass of the Day...

¹ The original has been deleted by Leaf Group, but can still be accessed using the Wayback machine at archive.org. Its URL was   ehow.com/how_5821908_hook-up-washer-dryer-apartment.html

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