Wednesday, March 9, 2016

Host Processors for Dummies

Computer network
We're pretty sure that opening an argument by quoting the dictionary definition of a critical term is a dead giveaway that you're trying to massage facts into supporting your argument. If nothing else, it betrays a lack of originality! In a similar vein, our staff at the Antisocial Network have noticed that a dead giveaways that an honoree is babbling on about a topic for which he or she lacks the slightest bit of background is the overuse of "authoritative references." Once, maybe, but when the post contains three different references in four paragraphs? it's a safe bet that the content is rather... questionable: questionable like eHow.com's Lexa W. Lee when she struggled to answer "What Is a Host Processor?"¹

Lee introduces her topic by telling her readers that
"A host processor refers to a central computer with accessory equipment to provide services more conveniently to its network, which may consist of many members at remote locations, according to PatentStorm."
Really? she went to PatentStorm for a "definition"? and the patent that Lee chose is for a distance learning system that only mentions host processors? Now that's useful – NOT. Next Lexa would have us understand (though she doesn't) that
 
"A server or computer workstation can act as a host processor, depending on the data needs of the network, according to the Portland Grou– NOTp. Depending on its hardware platform, the host processor may be bulky and expensive."
Duh: still didn't tell us anything (except that big computers can cost a lot)... maybe this will be useful?
"According to Martin H. Weik, author of the Fiber Optics Standard Dictionary, host processors can provide services such as support for software applications and computations, utility programs, database access and programming languages."
Nope, not useful -- you see, Lee still hasn't defined a "host processor." Let's see what her last paragraph says:
"Other names for a host processor include host computer, host machine or just host, according to Weik. Larger institutions typically require bigger host computers. Distance learning programs may require substantial host computers."
Finally, some information her readers could have used: Lee should have taken that "host computer" synonym and run with it, but she didn't. Instead, she wrote 140 words, about 15% of which were references to "authorities" and STILL didn't answer the question! So we will:

A host processor, also known as a host computer, is one node on a computer network that "hosts" the software, data, or running process for a user on another node in the network. In its simplest form, the user's computer serves only to display the software interface and results, while the software, data in use, and the running program reside elsewhere. That "elsewhere" is the host computer. In large enterprise networks, a few centralized computers may be hosts to different applications or datasets while many less powerful remote computers act as clients.
Lexa W. Lee didn't know this; clearly had no idea, and therefore had no business attempting to answer it. But she did, and that's why she's the recipient of today's Dumbass of the Day award.        


¹ The original has been deleted by Leaf Group, but can still be accessed using the Wayback machine at archive.org. Its URL was ehow.com/facts_6946047_host-processor_.html
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