Electrical Circuits for Dummies

Simple circuit with battery, bulb, and switch

The internet, it's been said, is a place where nobody knows you're a dog. According to the Antisocial Network research staff, its also the place where you get to pretend you're not a dumbass – unfortunately, you leave the evidence of your stupidity out there for anyone to see. One of our researchers came across some content not long ago that proves beyond a doubt that eHowian Megan Smith (aka Lindsay Champion), despite her BFA from NYU, is a DotD. Why would we say that? Because we read through Megan's "directions" for "How to Make Something Light Up With a Battery and a Switch."¹

Heck, most fifth-graders can tell you how to make a potato clock or light up a little bulb with only a pickle. Megan, however, was out of her depth with just three elements in the circuit she needed to design: battery, switch, flashlight bulb... way out of her depth...

This is a simple problem. The answer, according to our house electrician, is

1. Connect one end of the battery directly to the bulb's threaded casing
2. Connect the other end of the battery to one side of the switch
3. Connect the electrode in the center of the bulb to the other side of the switch

And voila! you're done. Well, that's not what Megan would have you do. After explaining "why" you might want to do this...

"A light bulb does not need to be installed into a wall or lamp in order to make it light up. Light bulbs can be attached to light switches and run by battery. This is especially useful in basement areas, on camping trips, or to show how electricity currents work in science class. Whether you are making a light bulb light with a battery and a light switch for practical or educational purposes, the project is a quick one that you can make inexpensively with supplies found at your local hardware store." "..installed into a wall"? Did she just say that? And wouldn't people just take a flashlight on a camping trip or into the basement? Anyway, once the required 75-word introduction was out of the way, Megan laid out the circuit for her readers, using a couple of strands of copper wire:

1. Press one end of the wire to the positive side of the D battery and affix with duct tape.
2. Connect the other end of the copper coated wire to the side of the light bulb that contains the threads of the bulb.
3. Affix the external contacts of the light switch to the positive and negative side of the battery and affix with duct tape.
4. Use the light switch to turn the light bulb on and off.

See anything wrong with this circuit? We do: there's no return path for the current from the bulb to the battery, and both poles of the switch are connected directly to the battery instead of in the line between battery and bulb: it simply won't work! This is despite Lindsay's, err, Megan's actually having a reference that explained how to do this at a grade-school level. What a maroon! What's even worse is that this crap has stood on eHow since 2009 (even though Champion changed her byline after a year or two). Whatever name she uses, though, she's still our Dumbass of the Day.

¹ The original has been deleted by Leaf Group, but can still be accessed using the Wayback machine at archive.org. Its URL was   ehow.com/how_5024366_make-light-up-battery-switch.html

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DD - ELECTRICAL