Getting Level on the Level for Dummies

See? the vertical vial is on the end, Dawn

Our research staff are human, which is to say that sometimes they let some of the dumbassery they uncover slip by. That's what originally happened with today's DotD nominee, a piece written by Dawn Sutton for Demand Media's eHow.com (now under the umbrella of Leaf Group) titled "How to Check the Level for a Plumb." The content looked fine in the first reading; but something nagged at our researcher until he went back and looked again – and it is, indeed, dumbassery.

We ignore the rather bizarre construction of "check the level for a plumb" because that's the OQ's problem, not Sutton's (it should probably have been "a level for plumb," not "the level for a plumb"). Whatever the case, at first reading Sutton, whose MSW work very likely didn't include wood shop classes, appears to have found an authoritative source to explain something she knows nothing about. Her instructions are,

"Position the level... against a vertical surface... Note the position of the liquid in the level bubble. Turn the level around, end for end, so that it is in the opposite position from the original position. When the bubble goes back to the same position as when you checked it in its original position, then the vial is correctly set."

Which, in our experience, will work to check whether a level's horizontal bubble is correct. It shouldn't require 82 words to say, but it will work. Next, Dawn advises her readers to

"Attach a level clamp [sic] tightly to a vertical object or post to set for plumb. If you are checking for plumb on a column or a post, which is more than 4 feet long, you will need to use a 4-foot long level. Levels can be made with a plastic, wood or metal frame.

Examine the liquid in the glass bubble in the center of the level. If it is plumb, the liquid should be straight across in the bubble and not on any kind of angle at all. It is important to be completely accurate. If the plumb is off, even by the smallest amount, it could compound problems as you continue with your remodeling project." We had to read it twice, but we finally figured out that what Sutton's trying to say here is something along the line of, "Use the same level to check a vertical surface for plumb. The bubble has to be in the very center of the vial, or the surface isn't plumb." Again, 116 words is overkill...

But what nagged at our staffer was two things: one, the center vial on a level is almost always set for evaluating horizontal surfaces, not vertical. And two, Sutton is apparently unaware that you have to check "a vertical object" in two planes to determine whether it's plumb, not just one. That's not to mention that the question wasn't how to use a level but how to verify that it's plumb; and the instructions she gives? Wrong for that question and not on-topic to begin with.

See that little hole (probably triangular) in one end of your level? You hang the level by that hole and let gravity tell you whether or not it's plumb. But Dawn, who has probably never even touched a four-foot carpenter's level, doesn't know that – and she shared her ignorance with the internet. You know what that makes Sutton, right? The Dumbass of the Day...

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