VW Beetle Hoods for Dummies

Original VW Bug (Type I or Beetle)

Our staffers run across a lot of self-appointed freelance writers who, sadly, seem to get a lot of things wrong. Heck, they have entire files on some of them, and when they're feeling lazy they just go to the file and nominate something they already found instead of going to the hassle of finding someone new. That's what happened today: we grabbed the file of four-time winner Baptist Johnson and picked something at random: "How to Pop the Hood on the VW Bug" (now at ItStillRuns.com). Apparently, his Biz-School studies included neither automotive history nor auto repair...

Our founder fondly remembers his first two Volkswagen Beetles, not to mention playing Slug-Bug with his sister on family trips. But we digress... anyway, he remembers bugs from the sixties, not to mention the taxi versions prowling Mexico City into the 21st Century. Of course, with the original rear-engine version that was the darling of hippies, no one was ever quite sure whether "hood" referred to the luggage compartment (front) or the engine compartment (rear). Baptist, however, seems unaware of the earlier version of the Beetle...

"The Volkswagen Type 1 is an economy car manufactured by Volkswagen (VW), a German car company. In American [sic], the Type 1 is commonly known by its nickname, the Beetle or Bug. Popping the hood on a VW Bug is tricky, but anyone can do it."

Oops, problems: first, Baptist says nothing about the difference between the Beetle and New Beetle; second, we don't say "In American," since "American" is an adjective; and third, if anyone can do it, why does Johnson think it's "tricky"? Baptist goes on to outline the two-step process; although to meet DMS rules he has to turn it into three steps. The second one, believe it or not, is "Go around to the front of the car." No duh... but that's where Baptist's instructions get weird: according to him, "You should notice a T-shaped tab sticking out from the center of your hood."

Ummm, Baptist, that tab you mentioned? They'll find it underneath and near the center of the front edge of the hood, not "sticking out from the center," you halfwit. Need we say more?

For those who were wondering about opening the hood of an original VW Bug, there's a round white handle below the dashboard and to the left of the steering wheel: pull it. Next, press the button on the bottom of the chromed handle on the luggage compartment and lift. If you don't to this, you can't get to the gas filler cap or the spare wheel. Getting into the engine compartment is easier: just push the button and lift.

Johnson, unfortunately, seemed completely unaware that there could be the slightest question about Beetle vs. New Beetle, not to mention his ignorance of the question about which end is the hood on the original Bug. Putting that ignorance on display is why we give out the Dumbass of the Day award, number five in Baptist's case.

copyright © 2017-2022 scmrak

DD - AUTOMOTIVE