Useless Information about Plantation Shutters for Dummies

plantation shutters

Our DotD candidates fall into two rough categories. Most of them are people we've caught giving incorrect information or instructions, but there are some who just provide, for lack of a better term, useless information. Most of the latter seem to inhabit Seekyt.com, where all they do is shill for some company. A few, however, can be found on the more traditional sites, HubPages and the Leaf Group family (formerly eHow.com). Today's nominee is a diving instructor and cable guy, Ed English, whom we found holding forth on "Do-It-Yourself Plantation Shutters."¹

Frankly, we aren't sure how English got this past the eHow censors... err, content editors, since to be honest, it doesn't say anything. Sure, Ed managed to pound out more than 300 words, but the vast bulk of it is throwaway verbiage and ordinary platitudes. Here, see what we mean: of "Choices," Ed asks his readers,

"What type of wood will you use? Will it be hardwood or softwood, dark or light? Will it be painted or stained with clear finish?"...

...and similar rubbish. Sorry, Eddie, but when someone is searching on DIY projects, they aren't looking for a list of "choices." Next, English tells us that if we will be "Building from Scratch" (as if anyone has done that since the Chinese bought a saw), "A wood planer and sander for shaping the pieces will be needed. Calculation and purchase of the wood types, sizes and coatings will be required. All of the hardware for assembling the shutters and attaching them to the existing window frames will be needed."

Well, Eddie, we're pretty sure that if you want to build your own shutters you'll need a lot more than a "wood planer and sander" – like, maybe, a saw? and a drill? and – we dunno, maybe plans? So Eddie allows that "Using Prefabricated Shutters" might be the best route, so he tells us that

"Ordering prefabricated shutters already painted or finished will require only the installation, saving even more time. Dexterity with common hand tools is required for this option, along with precise measurements to complete the project."

"Dexterity with common hand tools"? Is this ass kidding? Pray tell, oh SCUBA man, what tools would those be?
No, English did little more than recite some halfwit platitudes such as you might hear from a realtor or a high school sophomore who took a "home design" course. There's really squat in this post about performing a DIY project except that you'll need "dexterity" and even that's rubbish -- you don't need dexterity, you need the tools themselves (not all of which are "hand tools") and some knowledge of how to use them. It helps if you know more than our Dumbass of the Day, too...

¹ The original has been deleted by Leaf Group, but can still be accessed using the Wayback machine at archive.org. Its URL was    ehow.com/way_5291994_doityourself-plantation-shutters.html

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