Wednesday, January 29, 2020

Building Dishwasher Cabinets for Dummies

Dishwasher base cabinet
Dishwasher base cabinet
As our staffers wander the 'net in search of bogosity, stupidity, and downright dumbassery; they run across many freelancers who quite clearly haven't the faintest clue what they're talking about. That, sadly, doesn't seem to make a whit of difference to the greedy ones who plied their trade at eHow – some of whom still ply their trade there. Take, for instance, "award-winning journalist" Kimberley McGee, here to collect yet another award (her fourth DotD) for a Hunker article she gussied up, Nat Fondell's senseless treatment of "How to Make a Dishwasher Cabinet."

While there is such a thing as a dishwasher cabinet, the majority of kitchen designs call for an open space, covered by the installed countertop, in which a built-in dishwasher rests on the floor. The side walls are that of a sink base on one side and another cabinet on the other or occasionally a finished end panel. A dishwasher must rest on the floor because it has to be leveled independently of the cabinets to function properly. A dishwasher cabinet, then, is generally open on the front and the bottom and may, or may not, include a back beyond rails to hold the sides apart.

That is, of course, not what McGee had to say. No, Kimberley chirped that,
"Whether you are buying a new dishwasher to replace an old one and want a new cabinet or are looking to add another large appliance to your kitchen, building a dishwasher cabinet is a rather painless endeavor that can add space to your kitchen and time to your day."
Why someone would want a new cabinet for a dishwasher remains a mystery... Apparently, McGee hasn't spent much time looking at her kitchen cabinets!

She also hasn't spent much time looking at looking at dishwashers, either. According to Kim,
"Some portable dishwashers are slightly higher at 36 to 37 inches, with the same depth and width as a standard dishwasher."
That's probably true; we didn't check. What gave us pause, however, is this question: "Why would you need a cabinet with a portable dishwasher? Wouldn't that make it harder to use?" But, if you're dead set on making a cabinet for your dishwasher, here's some of Kimberley's advice:

  • "You can... buy a pre-made cabinet... and overhaul it to fit the area you need and the dishwasher you hope to purchase." — You'd better be more skilled with tools than McGee...
  • "The [sides] should be at least ¾ inch thick to handle the machine and keep noise down. Buy them two inches larger than the machine. You can tuck felt padding around the sides of the machine to minimize sound once you have finished." — Two inches larger in what dimension? Besides, both built-in and freestanding dishwashers already have sound installation, Kim.
  • "Drill through the top board and into the side boards before attaching the base, creating a hollow square." — We guess she means "box," not "square"; not that drilling "through the top board and into the side boards" creates one... And why do you need a base, anyway?
  • "You can also place the dishwasher on a sturdy drawer to raise it and make it easier to load and unload." — A) No, you can't, because that might damage the plumbing fittings, and B) how would that make it easier to load?
  • "Once built, you now have a perfect place to prep food or to extend your counter space with a surface for small appliances to be easily accessible." Does McGee not understand that the space for a built-in dishwasher is already under the countertop?
Given that a freestanding, portable dishwasher doesn't need a cabinet and, in fact, wouldn't function with one, the question that received McGee's "solution" is clearly one of how to make a base cabinet for a built-in dishwasher. In fact, unless the dishwasher is on the end of the rank of cabinets, you probably don't need one. In that case, the instructions our Dumbass of the Day provided are far too skimpy to be of use anyway.
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