What Does "Folding" Mean, Dummy?

Folding drafting table

The founder of the Antisocial Network fondly remembers the aphorism at the heart of his father's woodworking rubric: "Measure twice, cut once." It bears repeating... another mantra that bears repeating is, "A two-by-four is not two inches by four inches!" We'd like to think that anyone who works with lumber, or at least claims to, is aware that the finished size of a 2-by-4 is, in the real world, 1½" by 3½"... but apparently, lawyers disagree. Judges, on the other hand, seem to know better. In the case of eHow.com's Lynn Rademacher, not only is she bamboozled by lumber dimensions, she also seems to have a different definition of "folding" than most people; as is evident in her HomeSteady.com post, "How to Build a Folding Drafting Table."

We googled "folding drafting table," and the image above is pretty much representative of what we found: it's a sort of gate-leg table with an expansive top that sits at a tilt. When not in use, the front legs fold back and the top swings down. That, however, is not what Rademacher (and her "reference," some local woodworker) had in mind. No, according to Lynn, you,

"Measure four feet from the floor... and secure [a] two-by-four into place... [and finally] Attach the top of the desk to... hinges on the two-by-four support mounted to the wall."

Sorry, Lynn, that's not a "folding drafting table," that's a fold-down drafting table!

Of course, given Lynn's unfamiliarity with the materials used to make her table, anyone following her "instructions" is likely to have some problems. For example:

"...cut two pieces of one-by-four to 42 inches and two pieces to 29 inches. Position the shorter pieces so they are flush against the side of the longer pieces and use wood screws to secure them together. This is the frame for the drafting table top. The top will measure 42 inches by 31 inches."

Nope: the way she describes the butt joints is ambiguous, but this will either make a rectangle 43½" x 29" or 42" by 30½". Oops. Or how 'bout this suggestion:

"Use 1/4-inch PVC pipe to create the folding legs."

We're pretty certain there's no such animal as "1/4-inch PVC." Maybe she buys it at a dollhouse miniature company?

Rademacher ultimately rattles off a series of instructions that, to be frank, make zero sense. We aren't quite sure why she thinks she needs legs on the front and the back, since the desktop is attached to the wall-mounted 2-by-4, but hey: she supposedly got her these plans from a pro. We suspect that if we were Todd Krueger, we'd be asking her to take our name off this Dumbass of the Day post!

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