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Wednesday, August 5, 2020

Spinning Printer Reviews for Dummies

typical wireless printer
typical wireless printer
In the break room the other day, one of the newbies was confused by an offhand reference to "spinning content." Apparently, when she hears "spinning," she thinks Soul Cycle or Les Mills. Well, no, spinning content doesn't make you sweat... although it might make you want to gouge out your eyes. So here to introduce the concept of a spinning algorithm to our new employee is an article from SooperArticles.com, a veritable hotbed of spinners. It's returning DotD "Lawrence Barnett" and his "The Advantages of Using a Wireless Printer."¹

Barnett's name is in quotes 'cause it's pretty obvious that isn't his real name, any more than "Lela Burris" or "Bobby Lamb" (some of the other names attached to "his" photo). Whoever s/he is, s/he has access to a spinning algorithm; as evidenced by this:
"You truly needn't bother with any cables to run this machine. Innovation has unquestionably propelled nowadays. Every single electronic contraption comes in little sizes and becomes so helpful that one can barely trust they really work."
Never mind that you still need a power cable, we have no idea what "unquestionably propelled nowadays" means,  now can we parse "Every single electronic contraption comes in little sizes." It's as if "Lawrence" was just throwing words at the page... which is pretty much what a content spinner does.

Of course, there's more. We interpret the rather convoluted statement that,
"A major in addition to for a wireless laser printer is that it is helpful and extremely advantageous to convey starting with one spot then onto the next..." 
...to mean that wireless printer can be moved around. We think "Larry" is confused, though, when he burbles that,
"They can utilize this printer at home just as in their little office. They can take it with them in their office when they work and bring it home and use it there as well."
He's supposedly talking about a wireless printer – when did he change to a portable printer? We mean, we have a wireless printer at our office, and you don't stick that beast in your laptop bag to take home!

We could spend all day puzzling over some of Barnett's more baffling constructions, but we'll leave you with this one:
"With wireless printers, you can take prints from any piece of the house or office. It resembles a Wi-Fi framework so all computers can issue directions to the printer as long as it's inside the Wi-Fi go."
Uhhh, yeah: "take prints"... "Wi-Fi framework"... "Wi-Fi go."  Some of that is so puzzling, we don't know whether it's spinning or ignorance. Whatever the reason for the utter crapola, "Lawrence Barnett" is collecting today's Dumbass of the Day award.

Trust us: it'll be a while before we visit SooperArticles again, unless we feel a need to punish one of the interns for  believing something they read at eHow.com!

¹ The original has been deleted by the website, but can still be accessed using the Wayback machine at archive.org. Its URL was   www.sooperarticles.com/shopping-articles/advantages-using-wireless-printer-1715531.html
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DD - COMPUTERS

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