Whisky for Uninitiated Dummies

Indian single malt whisky

We've heard it said that few comestibles are more tightly controlled than Scotch Whisky, which is just fine by us – especially when it comes to Islay single malts that are old enough to vote. That's why it was with some trepidation that we read a post at WiseGEEK.com that allegedly answered the question, "What Is Malt Scotch Whiskey?" The answer, and we use that word loosely, was pounded out by serial DotD Malcolm Tatum; and our staff Scotch drinkers decided he deserved another award on the basis of a glaring error (or two)...

Tatum never bothered to correct the record: whiskey, with an e, is a corn-based spirit also known as bourbon. Whisky, without the e, is something else: it's made with malted barley, and in a different process from the liquor made in America.
Tatum managed to crib a version of the description for making whisky, including the fact that distillation takes place in a copper pot. He hemmed and hawed a bit about minimum aging (three years, but he said five) and mentioned that the raw spirits are aged in oak barrels:

"Once the distillation process is complete, the fermented liquid is stored in oak casks only. Like the use of copper containers during the initial stages, the use of oak containers is considered essential if the bouquet and the flavor of the scotch whiskey is to be perfect..."

Tatum gives the barrels short shrift here: unlike bourbon bottlers, Scottish distillers don't use new oak barrels. Instead, they buy used barrels from sherry bottlers and from – get this! – bourbon distillers. Otherwise the tannin in the oak would leach into the liquid and affect the "bouquet and the flavor."

Malcolm also seems confused about the availability of malt whisky, opining that,

"True malt scotch whiskey is not readily available in all parts of the world."

The fact that there's no such thing as "malt scotch whiskey" notwithstanding – it's malt Scotch whisky – the good stuff is widely available. Some of our tipplers were drinking single malts thirty years before Malcolm pounded out this crap in 2014!
More to the point, Tatum appears completely unaware that single-malt whisky is made in many countries using the same processes as Scottish distillers. Bill Murray was shilling for a Japanese brand, Suntory, in the 2003 film Lost In Translation; although The Yamazaki is actually better whisky (it can't be called "Scotch" if not made in Scotland). Hell, nowadays you can buy single malt whisky distilled in Texas!

Malcolm blew it by not realizing just how far out of his depth he was. As a reward, he's collecting a Dumbass of the Day award... well-deserved, we might add.

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