A Tenon Cutter for Utter Dummies

One type of log tenon cutter

 If the Antisocial Network staff had a motto, it would have to be something like "Never ask a massage therapist to explain an electrician's job," or perhaps "Never ask a plumber for instructions on a proctological procedure." You get the point, of course: people who have no clue about how to perform a task are most definitely not the ones to ask how to do it. Yet one internet company built a business out of doing exactly that. Today's nomination is evidence that it doesn't work. Meet Sanne Godfrey and her eHow.com post, "How to Build a Log Tenon Cutter" (now living at the niche site OurPastimes.com). 

In all honesty, we had no idea what the OQ was asking about. We figured it had something to do with building log cabins. Boy, were we wrong: we plugged "log tenon cutter" into a search engine and found out that the cutter is essentially a giant pencil sharpener for cutting round tenons on stock for log furniture. We were a little embarrassed...

...but nowhere near as embarrassed as Godfrey should be. Sanne apparently didn't research "log tenon cutter," she just researched "tenon." And that's why her first few words reveal her error: "The quickest and safest method for cutting precise log tenons is with a tenon-cutting jig on a table saw." What Sanne did, then, was research cutting tenons for mortise and tenon joints. We'd like to say that she found some instructions for a tenon jig and did a good job of "tech transfer"... but she didn't. We mean, really: how can you follow instructions like,

"Align the three matching 13-inch boards so that they are flush on each edge..." and  "Ease the entire jig forward to make the cheek cut on the face of the tenon. Slide the jig back to the starting position and repeat with the cheek cut on the opposite side of the board."

Besides having assembled her "instructions" by lifting measurements and plans from at least two slightly different designs, it is obvious that Godfrey had no idea what a tenon cutter is; not to mention that she wasn't particularly clear on what a tenon is. Either way, she woefully failed her assignment... unless, of course, that assignment was for her to named our Dumbass of the Day... again. Whatever the case, cutting a tenon on a log is entirely different from crafting the tenon of a mortise-and-tenon joint. Creating a log tenon is essentially carving the last inch or two of a rough, "rustic" piece of wood into a thick dowel. The jig Godfrey (sort of) describes will not make a tenon of that sort.

DDIY - JOINERY