Bike Computer Setup for Dummies

Sensor position

We realize that now's not the time to be thinking of hopping on your bicycle and cruising the local streets/trails/whatever... but we can dream. That brought our staffers together to look at some of our collection of potential DotD nominees in the world of self-powered two-wheelers. Sure enough, we came across a post by someone whose eHow.com bio claims that he was once a "contributing writer for Bicycling Magazine." It is, of course, a claim that can't be verified; but if true, based on what Wade Shaddy wrote in the GoneOutdoors.com post "How to Set Up a Bicycle Computer," he wasn't writing about maintenance... at least not maintenance in this century.

As anyone who's ever installed a cyclocomputer (a more technical name for "bicycle computer") can tell you, they come with installation instructions. That's probably why the OQ asked about setup instead of installation. Nevertheless, Shaddy pounded some 400 words, of which exactly fifty-five concerned setup and the rest were oddly specific installation instructions. Come to think of it, those fifty-five were actually rather useless:

"Check you [sic] bike's tire size, and check the manual for the tire size code. Hold the display button on the front of the computer until it prompts you for the code. Enter the code for your tire size into the computer by pressing the button when it displays the code to lock it in."

In the first place, if you have the manual at hand you don't need Wade's 350 other words, In the second place, you have to enter setup mode before you can access that prompt. And last but not least, his paltry setup instructions aren't of any use except for a few relatively simple (i.e., cheap) brands. For most computers, you'll have to enter the circumference of the tire as a four-digit number, not some "code." All that notwithstanding, Shaddy's grasp of the instructions seemed rather... obsolete. Take, for instance, steps like these:

• "Install the small cylindrical sensor from the kit. Attach it to the right front fork of your bike using the cable tie [sic] that came with the kit." – Sorry, Wade, no sensor has been "cylindrical" for decades. Oh, and if you're that smart about bicycles, shouldn't you say where on the fork? The wise cyclist installs the sensor on the front of the fork so that if the spokes bump it, the sensor will be pushed away from the wheel instead of tangling in the spokes. 
• "...adjust the position of the magnet so that when the wheel spins, the magnet will pass in front of the lower half of the sensor." – Not necessarily; sensors differ and all are marked with a zone. While we're at it, how far from the magnet to the sensor, hmmmm?
• "The mounting bracket looks like a small ring with a bracket on top." – Duh.
• "...[when you] spin the front wheel, the speedometer should register speed on the display. If it does not, adjust the magnet so that it is closer to the sensor. " – No, Wade, you have to move the sensor so that the magnet can get closer. Moving the magnet will take it out of the sensor zone.

In the past, we've believed that Shaddy's experience in carpentry meant his home maintenance posts are an improvement over the run of the mill J-school grad's ham-fisted attempts. Given his Dumbass of the Day work in a field where he claims expertise, perhaps we should take another look.

DD - BICYCLES