Rattling Doors for Dummies - The Freelance Files MMLXXVI

Spacers to reduce door clearance

If you pay much attention to advertising for over-the-counter medications, you might be familiar with the phrase "symptomatic relief." That's just the advertiser's way of saying, "This isn't a cure, it just makes you feel better." When there isn't a cure – e.g., the common cold – symptomatic relief is about all you can expect. When it comes to diagnosing problems in your home, however, just fixing the symptoms may not be the wiser course. Unfortunately, the freelancers at eHow.com, like Bailey Shoemaker Richards, weren't big on diagnosing problems; which is (one of the ways) why her HomeSteady.com post, "How to Stop a Bedroom Door From Rattling" went pear-shaped.

Shoemaker Richards, like many an experience-challenged DIY writer, went straight to "fix it" (and didn't do a very good job there). Where a more experienced person might have sat down and figured out what was causing the door to move in its jamb – a vagrant breeze, heavy traffic, a shifted foundation – Bailey jumped right in and started telling her readers how to fix the symptom. 

Those of us familiar with DIY home repairs know well the fallacy of fixing the symptoms instead of the root cause...

Whatever the case, Bailey's instructions also leave something (actually some things) to be desired. Take, for instance these examples:

• "When screws loosen in the door's hinges, the door can rattle and shake when it is opened." – Maybe, but the door is more likely to bind in the frame. Plus, Bailey had already said that, "A rattling bedroom door can cause problems with sleeping..." Sleepwalk much?
• "Use a hinge oil or a lubricant like WD-40. Apply the oil to the hinges and the doorknob to solve any squeaking or rattling that may occur as a result of stuck or dried hinges." – First, WD-40 is not a lubricant (coat the hinge pins with lithium grease instead) and second, sticky hinges aren't going to cause rattling.
• "Unscrew the strike plate from the door. This is the part of the door where the edge meets the door frame." – Besides the uselessness of that "description"; the strike plate is on the jamb, not the door. 

• "Remove the door stop from the doorjamb; a rattling sound can be caused by a space between the door and the door stop. Use pliers to remove the old nails from the door jamb." – Is she kidding? "Use pliers"? Fool, first you have to pop the stop molding (the "door stop") loose with something like a putty knife. 
• "Place the door stop back in its old position on the doorjamb and hammer it in with several nails." – That's not exactly a) good instructions or b) good grammar. In fact, it's probably easier to move the strike plate slightly closer to the stop molding than to move the molding. But what do we know???

We're really curious about why Baily didn't mention sticking in a few of those little felt "dots" that you can buy to prevent cabinet doors from slamming loudly. Any ideas?

No, Shoemaker Richards found some half-assed instructions that she then proceeded to convert to fully-assed. It's precisely this sort of ignorance that prompted us to start handing out the Dumbass of the Day award, an honor now being presented to Shoemaker Richards for the fourth time.

DDIY - DOORS