Garage Door DIY for Dummies - The Freelance Files MMCXII

homemade garage doors

The fine folks at eHow.com (now a division of Leaf Group) have long been kind enough to include a short bio of their contributors so that readers are aware of their expertise. It's interesting, however, to note that the vast majority of the site's content was written by people who claimed no expertise whatsoever in the topic at hand. Just today, we found an eHowian whose bio said that she had not only a Juris Doctor, but also "degrees in economics and business and teaching." Yeah, well, none of that massive pile of degrees appears to have prepared Samantha Kemp to tell us how to make an "Inexpensive DIY Garage Door"

What all that education seems to have done is taught Kemp how to  bullshit her way through a reference search – two references for garage-door maintenance and a content-farm post that purports to explain building a door – and pounding out a little generic text. We mean, who thinks that content from MadeMan.com is authoritative? Nobody here!

In reality, Kemp's set of instructions is little more than a reword of some truly crappy "instructions" from a MadeMan post of more or less the same name. Our staffers are in unanimous agreement that neither of the two authors had the slightest idea how to make a garage door. We'll take a look at Kemp's "steps" to give you a feeling for the level of expertise involved: "Make your own carriage garage doors by drawing a sketch to resemble the look you are going for and cutting wood to the size and shape with a saw. Hang the doors on frames and attach door hinges to the new doors. Add latches and treat your wood with a weather-resistant sealant."

Uh, yeah: that's a fine DIY garage door right there... NOT. And as for "inexpensive"? we rather doubt it. There is, of course more: how about these exquisite instructions for a barn door:

"Construct the door out of wood and attach a sliding track to the door so you can slide it open."

The fact that barn doors on on rollers instead of a "sliding track" notwithstanding, those are – again – instructions at the level of, "To build your house, pour a foundation and add walls and a roof." Technically correct, yeah, but helpful? Not a bit. And finally, there's this scintillating suggestion:

"Make a DIY garage door out of old cabinetry with recessed panels. Start with a plywood base and form two doors from the plywood. Screw cabinet doors that have recessed panels on them to the plywood doors."

Sam, you do know that there's a difference between interior construction, like cabinet doors, and exterior construction, like garage doors... don't you? Well, no, which is why you've earned the singular honor of being our Dumbass of the Day.

DDIY - DOORS