Gold for Dummy Business Types

Gold fever: yeehah! when the price of gold topped $1800/ounce a couple of years ago, people everywhere went crazy figuring out how to strike it rich overnight (without hard work, that is), and the denizens of eHow.com were happy to... let's be nice and say "help." Well, as much help as eHow usually provides, anyway, given that their stable of journalism and English majors aren't particularly good at getting across any information that might be considered science-y a wannabe prospectors might need. A case in point? have a look at eHowian Diane Bacher (a "certified business energy professional," whatever that is) as she mangles the contents of "Geological and Geographical Characteristics of Gold Mines" at Leaf Group niche BizFluent.com (now relocated to Sciencing.com, but still as stupid).

There are some things even a fourth-grader gets rightish about gold: placer mining vs. the mother lode, for instance. On the other hand, the same fourth-grader gets stuff wrong, and Bacher follows in that 9-year-old's footsteps with inane pseudoscience like,

"Lode deposits are the result of magna [sic], high temperature and high pressure that thrust liquid gold up from Earth's crust. Cooling water seeping through the metamorphic rocks hardens the gold, resulting in ore deposits that run through sedimentary rocks as veins. Lode deposits are found in old rocks, older than 2.5 billion years, belonging to the Archanean [sic] geologic period and near sea floor volcanoes. Typically, granite, basalts and komatites [sic] are found along with lode deposits."

"Magna"? Seriously? "...thrust liquid gold"? Seriously times two? The Antisocial Network's staff geologist found her description of hydrothermal ore deposition most amusing, or would have were it not such a scientific travesty. He also snickered over Bacher's misspelling of "komatiites," and he howled with laughter at the notion that lode deposits are only found in rocks "older than 2.5 billion years, belonging to the Archanean [sic] geologic period and near sea floor volcanoes." A pretty sweeping statement, and also complete dumbassery - gold deposits don't give a flying fig what the age of the country rock is - Archean or not.

Diane also displays more than a little difficulty with simple geography, mis-, or perhaps under-informing her readers that:

"Gold deposits are found in Northeast Canada, Brazil, Russia, the Congo, Egypt, Indonesia, Kazahstan [sic] and Australia."

Hmmm.... we imagine that prospectors in California (49ers), Alaska and Colorado, among other states in the western USA, are secretly pleased that Diane didn't send anyone in their directions. So we're supposed to think that there's no gold in Central and South America at all? We bet that would have surprised the Spanish Conquistadors in the 16th and 17th centuries, not to mention the Aztec, Inca and Mayan nations. So what happens when you ask a "certified business energy professional" about the geology and geography of gold deposits? Well, in this case, you get a dumbass who can't even copy and paste information. In other words, a Dumbass of the Day.

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DD - GEOLOGY