Auto Maintenance for Dummies (Seekyt Week 7)

Basic maintenance

All good things must come to an end. Crappy things must come to an end, too; meaning that our staff here at the Antisocial Network are overjoyed that today is day seven of our Seekyt week, and they no longer have to wade through that site, whose performance may be even worse than its content. Whew... To close out the week, we visit Dastan (dastanhomes), lecturing his readers about "Essential car maintenance tips and service." 

Besides the fact that Dastan (an Indo-Canadian handyman, we believe) doesn't know how to use the return key, there are myriad other problems with this copy-spin-paste piece. One such problem is

"Typically upkeep is done each 30,000 miles and it includes checking or repairing parts like spark plugs, wires and timing belts..." "[U]pkeep is done each 30,000 miles"? Isn't upkeep a continuous process? That's not to mention that the various service intervals – these aren't upkeep, they're service – vary widely from component to component, vehicle to vehicle. Some vehicles only need spark plug replacements every 100K miles. Some don't have a timing belt; they have a timing chain, which doesn't need to be replaced. No vehicle that we know of has a 30,000-mile replacement interval on its timing belt. So let's see what else Dastan has to say; like this obvious bit of spin: "While it may cost somewhat more, booking administration through your dealer not just ensures certifiable parts and skill, it additionally keeps your service history in line and up to date, which will draw in more purchasers and higher costs in the matter of offering your auto." "[B]ooking administration through your dealer"? More utter bullshit, reworded from "scheduled maintenance," we suppose. Plus, the reasons are specious anyway: even if you get your oil changed at a place like Jiffy Lube, companies keep a national database of service indexed to the VIN. Moving on... so here's a good one: "An obstructed air filter can diminish gas mileage in more seasoned autos with carbureted motors by as much as 14 percent." Ummm, we haven't had a vehicle with a carburetor in more than 20 years, so we guess it would be "more seasoned." You? Or another piece of spun bull,  "In the event that you choose to wash your auto yourself, don’t use family cleaning specialists like hand soap, dishwashing cleanser, or glass cleaner, which can likewise strip off the defensive wax. Use an item outlined particularly for autos." "[F]amily cleaning specialists"? "[O]utlined"? Boy, oh boy, do we hate content spinners here at the Antisocial Network. That's why we're closing out Seekyt week by handing Dastanhomes the not-so-coveted Dumbass of the Day award. This dumbass most assuredly deserves it, as is made abundantly clear by his closing statement:

"If in your case happen that it doesn’t pay off, and beside the regular maintenance, service and repair you happen to be included in an accident, try online to find expert help from service providers near you and at the best cost."

Darn, but that crap made our heads hurt.

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