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| Simple magnetic compass |
At the content farm formerly known as eHow.com – heck, still known as eHow.com – it's amusing to watch the house dumbasses thrash about to find enough factoids to meet the site's minimum word count, especially for simple questions. Take, for example, "Why Do People Use the Compass?"; answered, sort of, by the one of our most prolific dumbasses, Naima Manal at Sciencing.com. Not only does Naima drag in all manner of semirelated factoids to address the topic, she gets several of them... stupid. Take, for instance,
"[A compass] is an instrument composed of a suspended magnetic pointer that is attracted to the polarity of the North Pole."
The "polarity"? Sorry, you didn't use that word right, Naima. Oh – and the needle isn't attracted to the North Pole, it aligns itself with the earth's magnetic field to point to the north magnetic pole – which is not the same thing at all. As is typical of Ms Manal, there's more:
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"Through a slight left or right turn, a compass will accurately point to the North Pole and identify the angles of the other cardinal directions"
Ummm, the "angles of the other cardinal directions" can change? Through "slight turn[s]"? And we're not even out of the introduction yet! How about this classic bit of question-begging:
"The magnetic needle floats upon an axis, inside a compass apparatus, to easily align with the earth's magnetic pulls."
"Inside a compass apparatus?" Sheessh, what a dumbass. And, of course, there's Naima's closing remarks - always one of the "best" parts of her dumbassery: |
"Besides navigation, the compass is used in building and construction for marking landmarks and borders, and to measure horizontal lines and vertical lines for maps. The compass is a valuable tool used in the U.S. military, as well as in mining to assist in underground navigation."
| Perhaps you didn't notice: Naima never actually answers the question... So much for the "how" in "eHow," eh? But we couldn't leave without showing you that "measure horizontal lines and vertical lines for maps" rubbish. We repeat, what a dumbass – a Dumbass of the Day. |
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