Thursday, January 7, 2016

Texas Hill Country for the Dummy Tourist

Map of the Texas Hill Country
Do you like to travel? So do many of the staffers at the Antisocial Network, though some are more content to curl up in a comfy armchair with a good book. Whichever you prefer, you probably know that every nook and cranny of North America (and probably the world) is described somewhere online in stunning verbiage by the local tourist council. Of course, that's not nearly enough for you if you're in the mood for visiting some out-of-the-way places or sampling something beyond the usual tourist digs. If you're not the kind of person who vacations in Buenos Aires yet still eats at TGI Friday, you probably do your research online. Let's just hope you don't find too much information like the twaddle published at InfoBarrel.com by InfoJunkie in "Texas Hill Country: Relax, Shop, Play, Unwind in Hill Country."

Unlike so many online travel writers (e.g. Isabel Esteves), IJ may actually live somewhere within 500 miles of his target. Well, he at least writes a lot about Texas, but that doesn't mean he knows anything. We asked our Texas expert – she lived for seventeen years in the Lone Star State – to read through Info's article, and she just laughed. Here's what she said: "This guy has clearly never been to the Hill Country, unless he was driving down I-35 to South Padre for Spring Break!" When pressed for details, she pointed out:
     
  • Junkie says there are 55 cities in the Hill Country, though he only names Austin, San Marcos (which he spells wrong) and Fredericksburg -- he mentions San Antonio, which technically isn't in the Hill Country. He says nothing at all about places like Boerne, Cibolo, Kerrville, Mason, and the other towns (she hesitates to call them "cities") that aren't along I-35
  • Info seems to think there's nothing to do in the Hill Country (he must be Russian, since he keeps calling it "Hill Country" instead of "the Hill Country") except visit wineries. He left out shopping, sightseeing and hunting.
  • Junkie doesn't mention a single landmark, leaving out Elephant Rock, Canyon of the Eagles, Canyon Lake, or Lake Travis; not to mention the LBJ National Historic Site in Johnson City
  • Info doesn't mention the Kerrville Folk Festival or Fredericksburg's Oktoberfest...
No, it's pretty clear the InfoJunkie doesn't know much about the Texas Hill Country despite writing a travel article about it, and that's why we think he richly deserves a Dumbass of the Day award. In fact, we're fixin' to give him one right now!      
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