Tuesday, December 13, 2016

Metric Conversions the Dummies Way

Inches to feet and inches
Let's just suppose for a minute that you have blind date with a German guy arranged through Match.com (or some other internet dating site – it makes no difference.) Being a red-blooded American, your profile states your height in feet and inches: say, 5'-8" for example. Your potential date's profile, however, is metric – and it says he's 171 cm tall. Like many of your fellow Yanks, you're a little hazy on whether that's closer to Tom Thumb or Andre the Giant, so you look it up. Lo and behold, eHow.com's Greyson Ferguson has already told everyone "How to Convert 171 Centimeters to Feet and Inches"¹! O frabjous day!

Unfortunately, Ferguson's answer is a little weak. You see, after informing us that
"The United States is one of the few countries in the world that does not use the metric system. Depending on your viewpoint, it is either a good or bad thing. However, regardless of how you feel about it, you often are forced to convert measurements from metric to feet and [emphasis ours] inches..."
...Greyson continues by explaining that
"...If you have measured out 171 centimeters and need to know its exact measurement in either inches or [emphasis ours] feet, you can do so with a standard calculator."
Wait a minute, Greyson: the OQ asked about feet and inches, and your previous sentence said feet and inches; why have you suddenly decided that you should give instructions for feet or inches? Because you're a dumbass (as has already been demonstrated three times)!

Giving credit where partial credit is due, Ferguson sort of got the math right (not that it's particularly difficult). His answers are 67.32 inches and 5.61 feet, though we're not so sure that 5.61 is "slightly more than five and a half feet"... But, again, Greyson screwed the pooch when he stopped there: how tall is your potential mate in feet and inches? Well, that requires a second step Ferguson failed to include, either:
    
  • Divide 67.32 inches by 12 to get 5 feet with a remainder of about 7⅓ inches, or
  • Multiply 0.61 times 12 to get 5 feet plus about 7⅓ inches
     ...either way, you'd better wear flats on your blind date! So there you have 171 centimeters in feet and inches, no thanks to Greyson. He thinks people need to be told how to use a calculator ("Type 171 into the calculator, then press 'Divide.' Type in '2.54' and press 'Equal.'"), but can't be troubled to give just slightly tougher instructions for a complete answer. Yup, that's Dumbass of the Day territory!

¹ The original has been deleted by Leaf Group, but can still be accessed using the Wayback machine at archive.org. The URL was  ehow.com/how_7859521_convert-171-centimeters-feet-inches.html
copyright © 2016-2023 scmrak

MM - ARITHMETIC

No comments: