Splash Blocks for Dummies

Not how you use a splash block!

Today's example of utter stupidity is somewhat different from the name-calling and snarkiness we typically employ here at the Antisocial Network. Instead of calling out, by name, another greedy freelance writer spreading rubbish on the internet; we're going to feature a real-life example of an anonymous dumbass doing something utterly stupid out in the real world. Here's the story:

One of our staffers was walking the dog past an apartment complex in suburban Indianapolis recently and spotted something truly stupid. What he saw was probably compliments of maintenance personnel at The Fort Apartments. Take a look at the picture to the right.

Yes, that's right: some idiot turned a concrete splash block backwards – the raised lip is supposed to be closer to the building – and tilted it downward toward the foundation. The way this one's installed, all the water coming off a section of the roof will hit the splash block, reverse direction, and flow onto the foundation. Heaven help the apartment-dweller if that's a garden-level apartment, because someone's gonna get wet! No, fool, the chief purpose of a gutter system, including the downspouts, is to direct rain and melting snow away from the foundation. A splash block is supposed to form a channel pointing out, not in. In other words, the open end of the block should point to the sidewalk, and it should be lower than the closed end – everything about this one is backward.

Something people learn quite quickly when they become homeowners is that "Water is an enemy!" and it must be kept either in pipes or outside the walls at all times. Unfortunately, this idiot hasn't learned that lesson yet! Let's hope he or she doesn't get hit by a collapsing wall. Although come to think of it, the demise of our anonymous Dumbass of the Day in such a manner would qualify him (or her) for a Darwin Award!

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