Cherry for Dummies

cherry wood

One of our founders worked at a custom cabinet factory in summers while in high school. It may have been more years ago than he'd like to admit, but he learned a lot about wood and the craft of cabinetry. As a result of a couple of large custom orders, he's probably seen more cherry wood than most people – especially people like Tonya Kirkpatrick, a freelancer who attempted to share some "Helpful Facts about Cherry Wood Lumber" for readers of HubPages.com.

With a little judicious searching, we managed to find the original of the article Kirkpatrick reworded; or should we say "mangled." It's from an online version of Wood Magazine, if anyone wants to read copy that's both more accurate and more readable. Tonya's writing is... well, we'll just say it's sometimes difficult to follow.

Kirkpatrick starts out (as does the original) by describing the black cherry tree and its fruit, but only after introducing the species by telling us that

"The cherry wood lumber has its own warmth and personality that offers to its users as it cuts, stains and will sand beautifully compared to other types of wood..."

...which, frankly, we couldn't unpack. And although cherry is indeed attractive, it's not necessarily the most beautiful of all woods, as Tonya implies. She continues by writing that

"American black cherry wood lumber is used mainly for paneling and can be bought as a veneer, caskets and other speciality [sic] items that you may be interested in such as tobacco pipes and guns..."

...talk about your non-parallel construction... And what's this crap with always saying "wood lumber," anyway? She said that twelve friggin' times – what's wrong with "cherry wood," or just "cherry"?! But it's when Kirkpatrick starts paraphrasing the original that she really goes crackers. Take, for instance, this paragraph:

"Cherry wood lumber is going to have a pale yellow color of sapwood and a darker heartwood as the woods color deepens to turn into a reddish brown that resembles mahogany when it is exposed to the outside," Which is Tonya's rewording of information such as "When first cut, cherry looks a pale, pinkish brown, but it gradually darkens to a mahogany-like red. Often, the very light-colored sapwood, as well as resin or gum pockets, will be present in boards." Or she explains that

"The one thing that you may not know is that the sapwood will never turn to the color as [sic] the heartwood no matter what you do to the cherry wood lumber..."

...which is something anyone who's worked with any wood knows: heartwood and sapwood are not identical in most  species. Tonya also "informs" her readers that

"The cherry wood lumber will often times show a wavy pattern when it is finished being processed..."

...clearly her version of

"Cherry veneers... feature straight grain, though you'll occasionally find... a mild ripple figure available..."

...from the original. Tonya never quite gets to any important information about working cherry wood – is it hard? How hard? Does it turn well? What are the best finishes? Is it tight- or open-grained? She also neglects to mention that cherry sawdust may contain irritants and toxins not present in most other wood.
No, Kirkpatrick picked up an article somewhere and, without the slightest idea what she was saying and the significance of any unfamiliar terms, Tonya proceeded to reword it and publish it at HubPages – solely to pick up a few pennies. That's pretty much our definition of a Dumbass of the Day...

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