Doggy Crates for DIY Dummies

These plans will not make this crate...

Many of the staffers here at Antisocial Network World Headquarters are do-it-yourselfers, which is one reason why they spend a lot of time making fun of ridiculous DIY instructions at places like HomeSteady.com, HubPages.com, and Hunker.com (to name a few). The main reason a lot of people do it themselves is that they think they make something cheaper than a commercial version. We're gonna test that idea today based on and article at TheNest.com: "How to Build an Inside Wood Dog Crate" by Courtney McCaffrey.

We don't know where McCaffrey came up with the plans, if there even were any – no references are provided – but it's pretty clear she'd never actually attempted such a project herself. In a nutshell, Courtney's plans are to cut a pair of  matched 1-inch plywood sheets, make a 3-sided "jail" of 1-inch dowels, and slap a third sheet of 1-inch plywood on the open end to serve as a door. We ran the cost based on  a local lumberyard (the only one that sells 1-inch plywood):

• 4 x 8 sheet of 1-inch plywood: $48.99 for CDX, the only one-inch plywood available
• 1-inch dowels: $4.48 for a 6-foot dowel – assume 4 each for $17.92
• 2 hinges: 2-inch gate hinges, $2.97
• a latch: slide latch, $4.27
• 1" spade bit: $3.99

That's a total of $72.14 (plus tax), not including the circular saw, cordless drill, and glue needed to complete the project. Of course, it would look like crap because of McCaffrey's half-assed instructions like,

"Drill into the plywood with your 1 inch spade bit going about halfway through it at each of your marks. Put a little wood glue into each hole and insert your dowel rods. Wipe away excess glue and allow it to dry for the time specified on the label."

Really? drill "about" halfway through? Does McCaffrey even know that a spade bit has a point on it and that you'd probably be drilling into the floor? Does McCaffrey realize that if you let the glue dry before moving to the next step, you won't be able to,

"Turn [the top] piece over and place it on top of the existing crate, so the dowels go into the holes. You may need to adjust a couple dowels to get them in."?

Do we think this woman was making it up as she went along? Yes, for several reasons, including:

1. ¾-inch plywood is far  more widely available than 1-inch (and less expensive)
2. ½-inch (or even smaller) dowels would be more than sufficient
3. Anyone with half a brain would drill all the way through both top and bottom sheets to get the holes lined up, and would use some sort of measuring tool to make certain the whole thing is square.
4. McCaffrey's instructions for the hinges and latch are just plain stupid.

Most of all, however, the whole idea of a DIY crate is to save a few bucks. You can buy a folding metal crate – one that will set up square and firm, and has a latch that actually keeps the door closed – for about half of what this crapalicious plan would cost you. That is, of course, unless you think the "media studies" degree our Dumbass of the Day boasts makes her an expert on dog crates...

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