Sunday, May 13, 2018

Mounting Window Blinds for Dummies

side mount blind bracket
Side mount blind bracket
Nothing tips off our research staffers to out-and-out rubbish like reading DIY instructions that were clearly written without any knowledge of the task. One of the most common ways this situation is revealed is writers who seem to be unaware that they've made a basic error in defining the problem at hand. Take, for instance, returning DotD Jonra Springs, who we found pretending to know "How to Install Top Mount Window Blinds" for the mother site at eHow.com.

Jonra's ignorance of mounting window blinds is transparent from the get-go, when he differentiated top-mount blinds from other styles in his introduction:
"Top mount blinds are supported by brackets that install behind the top rail and are hidden better than side mounting brackets."
That sort of comment left our staffer wondering if Springs had ever even tried to install blinds, which she was pretty sure is the second DIY project most people tackle (after hanging pictures). It's pretty obvious that Jonra has confused "side mounting brackets" with outside mounts. In reality, both top-and side-mounted brackets are placed on the inside surface of a window that has no trim molding so that the blinds are entirely within the opening. Such windows may be fixed, casement, or single- or double-hung sash windows. Outside mounts are fixed to the molding, usually of sash windows, or to the wall adjacent to any type of window. Those blinds overlap the edges of the opening.
Springs, however, blithely blundered along; spreading such misinformation as,
"...top brackets clip onto the upper side of the mini blind top rail, and release the hold as easily."
We aren't sure why he focused on mini-blinds; but staffers who've taken on this project assure us that the top brackets don't "clip onto the upper side of the mini blind top rail," nor do they "release the hold" easily. Every blind any of our folks has installed involves a metal or plastic box an open side and (sometimes) one hinged side; the top rail fits into the mounted box, after which you snap the hinged side closed.

We have no idea where Jonra came up with his "instructions," but the most useful information he shares is actually that "All necessary hardware to hang a blind comes with the top mounts." In reality, we'd be inclined to say that, "All necessary mounting hardware comes with your new blinds. Follow the included instructions." But that's us, not to mention that a mere thirteen words would not have met the all-holy minimum word count at eHow.

Jonra met the MWC by shamelessly copying the instructions for a specific brand of mini-blind, even though the prefix "mini" does not appear in the question. That, by itself, is more than enough for this liberal arts grad and "computer professional" to earn his third Dumbass of the Day award.        
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