Bicycle Gear for the Dummy Shopper

Every once in a while we run across yet another wannabe content farm. In the post-Panda era, the "crops" at these farms tend to be almost unreadable because of an excess of ads, but that's not their worst trait. Sadly, although many of the world's freelancers are happy to earn 20¢ a day for all their articles, native English speakers aren't. That's very likely why Bubblews was overrun by Filipino teenagers. But on point: today, we feature a writer from a hitherto untapped site, SooperArticles.com: he's Alex Simba, and he penned "Let' [sic] Have a Look on [sic] Essential Cycling Accessories."

Based on style and content, SooperArticles.com is probably a sister site to EzineArticles.com, which isn't a particularly positive relationship in our book. Be that as it may, we'll try to skewer Simba without making fun of his second language too much. After all, none of us speaks Hindi or Swahili... "Alex" starts out explaining that,

"Walk into any cycling shop and you will doubtlessly be taking a gander at several sections and accomplices to add to your cycling pack of traps. A hefty portion of them are 'pleasant to have' devices and numerous are simply out and out vital. So what are the parts and extras one must have on any cycling trip?"

Face it: anyone who doesn't recognize that crap as spun content just isn't paying attention. Let's see what "parts and extras" Simba thinks are "pleasant to have" (and why) and what are "out and out vital."

• "Pick a quality combine of socks that have a dampness wicking highlight and pick cycling shoes that can deplete water productively." – Huh?
• "Utilize an under the seat mounted sack to hold your repair unit. You ought to have a tube repair unit, the right connection stick [WTF?] for your chain, and a multi-apparatus in this sack." – He means an under-seat pack.
• "...a decent multi-tool will include tire levers and a chain device" – We've never seen a multitool with tire levers or a "chain device."

"Don't depend on an air compressor being accessible where you have a level." – we think he means a "flat." "Brilliant lights will be as splendid as an autos front light and will incorporate battery packs that can be energized." – Duh. "Frame mounted cages for water jugs can be utilized also." – That's apparently what happens when you spin "bottle." That's about the size of it. No, wait, one more thing: Simba has his own online sporting goods store (which all of our security software flags as a potential problem site), and this rubbish is all about sending people there. In other words, instead of a sister site of EzineArticles, it's almost as if our Dumbass of the Day is writing for a sister site of Seekyt!

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