Garages and Garage Doors for Dummies

Garage design ideas

We spend a lot of time at the many former eHow websites, mainly because they're target-rich environments where (in theory) the content is on-point and isn't thinly-disguised advertising spun into English by greed-sucking pigs who aren't particularly familiar with that language. Then again, there are the other, smaller content farms where all of the above comes into play. We usually ignore them. Every once in a while, though, we reach out for their special flavor of dumbassery... and that's why we're here today: meet Lora Davis of EzineArticles.com and her post, "Garage Door Designs."

Davis published more than 600 articles at Ezine, many bunched together both topically and chronologically. Most seem to be rather harmless, or at the most so bland as to be of little use other than as filler. All seem to end with a link to a business; in this case a couple of garage door companies in Chicagoland (a bit of a stretch for a Texas¹ writer, if you ask us). Be that as it may, the reason Lora got the nod for today is simple: her post has jack to do with garage door design.
No, instead, Davis blathers on for several hundred words about building a garage. Included are such bizarre lines as,

• "When building a new garage there are many different aspects that you will need to consider. The garage door company that you are getting your garage from can answer many of these questions..." – We're pretty sure the door company doesn't sell you a garage or, for that matter, build one for you.
• "Planning a new garage calls for detailed planning..." – No duh.
• "One important thing that a garage door company will need to know is whether it will be an attached or detached garage..." – Actually, the door company probably doesn't give a rat's hiney which it is. That's the builder's job.

• "If you... choose a detached garage... From the garage to the home you could also build a nice aesthetically walkway." – Say what?
• "...with an automated door system... the door will automatically open when your car gets near the door. This design will save you getting out of your car and opening the doors." – We think that's called a "garage-door opener."
• "Before you start to design your new garage be sure that you look at your budget because you do not want to run out of money and have a half-finished garage." – We repeat: No duh!

Combine some of the dumbassery inherent in Davis' post with the total absence of information about garage door design, and it's no wonder someone in our research department flagged her post for Dumbass of the Day. We mean, really: this is a woman who thinks garage door companies build garages! WTF!

¹ Some references place Lora in India. Makes more sense to us.

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