Cabinet Filler Strips for Dummies

Scribing the filler

A staffer who grew up hearing blonde jokes¹ occasionally refers to the freelancers who plied their trade at eHow.com as "The blonde leading the blonde." The insensitivity of the play on "blind leading..." not withstanding, the idea is still on point: these are, too often, people who don't know something trying to tell people that same something. Perhaps the only thing worse, at least in our estimation, is the freelancers Leaf Group tapped to rewrite some of these crapulous posts; especially when the rewrite is worse than the original. That's the case with "How to Install Kitchen Cabinet Fillers" at Hunker.com, as rewritten by Stephanie Faris.

Truth be told, the original (see it at archive.org) by one John Fechik (a cabinet maker) was pretty darned good. He was a little enthusiastic about backer boards, but otherwise OK. Faris, on the other hand, is not a cabinetmaker: she's a freelancer who writes kiddy lit. Steph did a little research and found (somewhere, she didn't say where) instructions for installing the filler. In case you didn't know, as Fechik said, they are

"...used between kitchen cabinets or near a wall at the end of the cabinets to cover any gaps. "

Faris, on the other hand, launched straight into her project with,

"You probably will not know how contoured a wall is until you try to fit a cabinet against it."

Correcting for that is the bulk of her post, in which she detailed,

• Fitting the filler into the space (including the bogus "You can also buy fillers at your local hardware store in a variety of finishes if the ones included with your cabinetry aren't large enough.")
• Scribing the filler board to fit any irregularities (a word she never uses) in the adjacent wall: "Using a scriber, mark a line down the filler where you need to cut." We don't know, Stephanie, but shouldn't this be a little more informative than "use a scriber"?
• Trim the filler to match the scribed line: "[Use] a circular saw to cut off the excess, staying just past the line. You'll use a planer to file down the rest to create a smooth edge." Ummm, Steph? Why specify a circular saw? And don't you know that a planer is just going to trim away a constant thickness from the cut edge? Perhaps your source actually said to use a plane...
• Install the trimmed filler: "Once you have your filler the right size, tap it in place by placing a protective block of wood at the top of the filler and lightly hitting it with a hammer. You can then sand it to create a smooth finish." Shouldn't you, we dunno, fix the filler in place with screws, maybe? Otherwise it's gonna fall out...

We had to laugh at Faris' parting words, which informed her readers that,

"Installing kitchen cabinets is a fun do-it-yourself project that you can complete in a weekend."

Oh, sure: this is coming from someone who clearly has never installed a cabinet in her life! Is it any wonder that Stephanie is collecting her second Dumbass of the Day award, Rewrite Division?

¹ e.g., Q: What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair red? A: Artificial intelligence. Yes, it's both sexist and... what, "hairist"? 

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