Building a Roll-top Door with a Dummy - The Freelance Files MMCIV

articulating roll-top door 

Trying to follow instructions written by an expert can be difficult if you have no experience with the task. Trust us on that: you lack the anility to visualize the various techniques and procedures... Difficult as doing so may be, you're far worse off if you try to follow directions reworded by freelancers who had no idea what they were talking about. We found exactly that situation when we read the eHow.com post, "How to Build a Wooden Roll Top Door in a Cabinet," posted by freelancer Jonah Morrissey.

Morrissey found a post online (it's no longer at the URL Leaf Group claims, but we found it again by search the PDF for the word "tambour") that describes making tambour doors – the term of art for this design – and decided to reword the most difficult of the three techniques discussed. Oh, and to make this tambour, you'll need to shell out for a three-bit tambour set costing just south of $190. Then again, Morrissey could have just told his readers to use wooden slats glued to canvas like everyone else does.

But no: a freelancer who seems to know next to nothing about woodcraft attempted to transcribe complex instructions for an articulating tambour, with less than satisfactory results. Then again, these are "expert" instructions from someone who told his readers that the first item you'll need for this project is a "Cabinet opening, 8 x 12 x 8 inches." Damn, Skippy, that's a pretty weird-sized opening!

But that ain't all: Jonah shared a boatload of misinformation about this project, starting with the basic measurements of the slats. Never mind his doofus opening measurement, Morrissey told people to cut "5 hardwood slates [sic], 1/2 x 2 1/8 x 12 1/2 inches each" to make this door... except that documentation for the bit set clearly states that, "Each slat measures approximately 1/2" x 1."" Looks like Jonah's in trouble from the get-go, through he really isn't – he just doesn't understand what he's doing.

The instructions in his copy-reword-paste job aren't much more help, though. Here's how Morrissey described beginning the process:

"Make profiles in the slats. Install the profile bit on your router table. Run four of the 1/2 x 2 1/8 x 12 1/2-inch hardwood slats with the 1/2-inch side down against the table. Run both 2 1/8-inch sides of each of the four slats, making two passes. Run only one 2 1/8-inch side on the fifth board, making two passes."

Based on the third sentence alone, it's a given that Jonah had no idea how to use a router or a router table, not to mention having no idea what these profiles are. In reality, the profile bit creates one side of the "ball" of a ball-and-socket arrangement, so you cut the same edge from both sides. Not "both 2 1/8-inch sides of each of the four slats," whatever that's supposed to mean.

Next, Jonah wanted you to cut a kerf in the opposite edge to allow a special bit to cut the "socket" of the ball-and-socket arrangement. Jonah's problem here is that he didn't know the word "kerf," the term of art. Instead, his reader is supposed to,

"Using a table saw, cut an 1/8-inch slit down the centers of the 1/2-inch faces on each slat."

Well, Jonah, you only cut the "slit" on one edge, since the other edge is already shaped. By the way, how deep is this kerf supposed to be? Morrissey didn't say. What he did say is,

"Run the 1/2-inch sides of the four center slats through the router table along the center of the 1/8-inch slit you previously cut. Route [sic] only the one side of the fifth board."

Sorry, dude, you only put a ball on one edge of each slat. 

If you combine the original material Morrissey used, the manufacturer's description at the River, and a basic knowledge of woodworking; you can just about figure out how this system works (it's pretty cool, in fact). Jonah's ignorance of terminology and how to use a router and table means, though, that it's well-nigh impossible to make a roll-top door based on what our Dumbass of the Day wrote down. Then again, he probably didn't take wood shop on his way to his "communications" degree.

DDIY - FURNITURE